The Art of Doing Nothing (Without Feeling Guilty)

I’m not sure when “rest” became a dirty word, but somewhere between adulthood, motherhood, and that one self-help book that told me to optimize my morning routine, I forgot how to do absolutely nothing.

I don’t mean “nothing” as in scrolling TikTok with a load of laundry going. I mean real nothing, the kind where you’re not producing, performing, or proving your worth to anyone.

The kind of nothing that feels like exhaling.

But somewhere along the line, we started treating rest like a reward instead of a requirement. We call it “self-care,” which sounds cute and marketable, but it’s really just code for “finally stopping before I fall apart.”

And when we do rest, the guilt creeps in.

The voice that says, “You could be getting ahead.”
Or, “You should probably clean something.”
Or my personal favorite: “Other women do it all, why can’t you?”

We’ve been conditioned to believe that stillness is laziness. That our value is measured in output. That if we stop, the world (or at least our household) might collapse.

But here’s the truth: the world won’t end if you rest. It might actually get better.

Because when I finally gave myself permission to do nothing, to sit outside with coffee and no agenda, to take a nap without earning it first, to exist without multitasking, I realized something wild: I came back better.
More patient. More creative. More me.

Doing nothing is an act of rebellion in a world that keeps shouting, “Do more.”
It’s choosing presence over performance.
It’s saying, “I am allowed to rest, even when there’s more to do.”

So here’s your reminder:
You don’t need to deserve rest.
You don’t need to earn quiet.
And you sure as hell don’t need to apologize for pausing.

Put your phone down. Sit in the sun. Stare at the ceiling. Exist.

Doing nothing might just be the most productive thing you do all day.

What would it look like if you gave yourself permission to do nothing this week?

— Unfiltered Emily Hayes